The Cone

Hello and welcome to a new topic we plan to cover every month – sex toys.  Is the subject taboo?  Do you ever mention it at parties? Well, how do we learn about these interesting items?

Do we fork over hard earned cash and hope for the best? After all, I don’t think many of us would have the cajones to actually return a product we’ve used… er… um… intimately. Stop by here and see what I’ve tried and liked and maybe visit some links where you can check out some other reviews by real people.

I promise the sites will never be something you could get arrested for visiting and never something you have to worry about opening (i.e. pictures of naked people, and/or porn stuff) unless I have otherwise noted.

The first item I’m reviewing is one I’ve mentioned in my manuscript, Vampire Vacation. Hopefully, an editor won’t make me remove all references to an actual brand in the final published version, but we’ll have to wait and see.  I’ve given this item as a gift and talked about it with a group of friends going over my MS (dubbed Gossip Fest), and hence, a lot of my neighbors now own it.  All have glowing things to say.

The Cone


Ah… a nifty gadget with pictures for an instruction manual–which I’ve posted randomly throughout this review (forgive the crappy quality, it was all the site had). The product bills itself for both male and female use and I can understand how it would stimulate the prostrate, so why not?

It has two buttons (see above), one that turns it on and off, and one that helps you rotate between all sixteen vibrartion/pulsation settings. Sixteen?!?  Yes, (Oh, yes!) you read that right.

There is also a feature that when you press and hold the on/off button down for a few seconds it jumps to the big “O” setting.  The ever-changing fast-paced setting is designed to drive you to your peak quickly.

We had friends who attended our adults-only halloween party this year and they hated the costumes they’d purchased. They arrived late to the party because they decided to go with a more unique homemade costume–they wore robes over undergarments/nighties, had condoms and lube spilling out of a robe pocket, and carried the empty cone box in one hand!  They announced upon arrival, “We’re sorry we’re late. We were busy.”

Man, I never laughed so hard in my life!  The kicker to all this is the wife did not attend that fateful Gossip Fest night, nor did she get it as a gift from me.  She read my manuscript and went to the web to find the product! Her husband likes it so much–and has become a staunch advocate of the cone–that he suggested we give it to another friend for her birthday this past January.  Now, if you knew this straight-laced, amiable guy you’d be spitting vodka out of your nose like I almost did when he suggested it to me at a New Year’s Eve party.

I’m pretty sure I bought our Cone at drugstore.com, but it was much pricier two and half or three years ago when I got it.  Did you even know that website have a sexual well-being section that delivers cool stuff to you in a drugstore.com box?  Can’t get any better for buying sex toys, you know?

It was a risky purchase.  I wasn’t so sure it was worth the $129.00 price tag.  Or course, last year when my tipsy friends left my house and scrambled home to the Internet, they found it on Amazon for much less.  It even comes in black now! While I can’t say this toy will be the “one” that you use every time you decide to incorporate a gadget when you make love, I can tell you that whenever it comes out of the drawer it’s an enjoyable night!

You’ll read some amazing reviews and you’ll read some luke-warm ones regarding any product.  Real people using real gadgets can all expect completely different results.  I can tell you one thing, out of the eight people I know who’ve used it they all agree on The Cone’s rating:

Five Big O’s

(with five being the highest)

Ease of Use: Five out of five stars

(seriously, you hit a button and it’s hands free, doesn’t get much easier than that!)

Here are some SAFE reviews you can view from Amazon, please check out the good and the bad.  Every voice is unique, but I can tell you that most people who like a sex toy don’t talk about it online, it’s only the few who don’t care for an item that will speak up. (and not many want their name on the review!)

Amazon Reviews of The Cone

Have you tried it?  Know anyone that has? Share your thoughts with us!

Hope to see you next month for more Sex Toys!

~~ C.J. Ellisson ~~

Find more of C.J. on TwitterFacebookWebsiteBlog

Please tune in on September 29th for the continuation of Johnny Living Dangerously’s first installment: Levi’s Button Fly.

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About C.J. Ellisson

I'm a full-time writer. My debut novel, VAMPIRE VACATION, released this fall in ebook and print. I'm currently working on its sequel, THE HUNT, a middle grade fantasy, BLACK IS FOR LIES, and an ongoing erotica serial called "Johnny Living Dangerously".
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